I Can Feel It
by 96flowers
Summary: Tumblr Prompt. One-shot. This is how I imagine the aftermath of Clara stepping into the Doctor's time stream played out. "I can feel it." "Feel what?" "Everything"


**This is a prompt I found on Tumblr. There was no specification for any particular fandom so I took it and made it Doctor Who. If you have a tumblr I am also posting my one-shots on my Tumblr account: 96flowers.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who. If I did, Clara would still be a companion.**

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" **I Can Feel It"**

"Clara, what are you doing?" The Doctor asked worriedly coming into the consul room. She was standing at the monitor fiddling with several of the nobs. She had a lost look on her face and didn't seem to realize what she was doing. She didn't notice that the Doctor had joined her. He gently walked up to her and stilled her hands from what they were doing. She looked up startled that he was there. His eyes were big and full of concern, "Are you alright?"

She just shrugged and went back to staring at the monitor. Now he was worried, she was never like this, from the moment he had met her she was always so full of energy or at least had something to say.

It had been about three days since she had stepped into his time stream to save him from the Great Intelligence. She had been asleep for over 48 hours, allowing all the new lives she lived to settle in her mind so she wouldn't burn like Donna had. He had gone to see if she was still in bed and when she hadn't been there he had asked the TARDIS to lead him to Clara. The Doctor hadn't expected to find her in the consul room. When she continued to just stare at the screen he gently put his arms around her from behind and held her. While he was holding her he flashed back to after he had pulled her from the time stream.

 _There was a blinding flash and everything settled. The room stopped shaking and the rip that was the Doctor's time stream settled down to how it had been when the travelers had first arrived. Madam Vastra and Jenny where looking on in concern at seeing the Doctor carrying an unconscious Clara as he continued walking away from his grave. He didn't say a word as he led them, and Strax, back to where his TARDIS had fallen._

 _The doors opened for him without any prompt, the three trailed along behind him. He turned to them for the first time since leaving his grave._

" _I'll be right back, I'm going to take her to her room and make sure there isn't any lasting damage," He had said quietly before taking the stair case at his right down to the bedrooms, but before he was out of range he turned back for a moment. "Vastra, I do believe you know how to get the TARDIS into flight?"_

" _Yes, but that's all," the Silurian said softly._

" _That's all I need you to do, I'll be back to take you home in a moment." Then he was gone from the consul room._

 _He walked silently along the corridor and he almost smiled when he heard the engines start and felt the ship dematerialize into the time vortex. He knew it was a good thing to teach her how to get the ship into the vortex, even if she couldn't put in coordinates for a destination and fly her. They were technically just floating in the vortex, letting the time winds carry them. He knew the TARDIS wouldn't let them get into trouble while Clara was not healthy._

 _Reaching her room he gently settled he down on the bed and set about making her comfortable. He gently pulled her shoes off of her feet and pulled the comforter down so he could settle her into the bed. He went into the adjoining bathroom to fetch a wash cloth to wipe the dirt and sweat from her face and arms. When he reentered the bedroom Clara was starting to wake up from the unconsciousness she slipped into after she saw himself from The War. He swiftly walked over to her side and gently sat next to her and held her hand as her eyes fluttered open._

" _Clara?" he called softly. "Can you hear me?"_

' _Doctor?" he voice was soft and filled with pain. Her big brown eyes opened and looked in the direction of the doctor but didn't really see him. Her eyes were focused on something that only she could see. "Help me. Please."_

" _Oh Clara, my Clara," he said softly as he gently washed her face. "What's wrong? What can I do?"_

" _I can feel it," she croaked and leaned into the cold washcloth._

" _Feel what?" he asked worriedly. "Clara, feel what?"_

" _Everything," she breathed and scrunched her eyes in pain. "I can feel it all, every life I have lived, every death I died. I can feel it, all at once, and it_ hurts."

" _Oh no," The Doctor breathed, eyes wide. His mind was running at a thousand times faster than it normally does to come up with a solution to the problem at hand. Then it slammed into his head like a bullet. Her situation was so similar to Donna's and how many nights had he spent thinking of different ways he could have saved her before he finally figured it out? Now he can use it to save Clara so she wouldn't face the same fate. He gently took her face in his hands and her eyes opened and fixed on his asking for relief. "I can fix this but I need you to trust me Clara, I need you to let me in your mind."_

" _I always trust you," she whispered as she let down the walls she had around her mind. They were a side effect of her life from Gallifrey, who, like all Time Lords, had telepathic abilities that she learned to control from a young age. The Doctor immediately entered her mind and was bombarded from all sides by the memories from all her lives. He started wading through them till he reached the center of her mind, the place where all of her own life's memories were located. Standing there with her back to him was Clara's mind projection of herself. She was looking upward at all the memories swirling through her head. The doctor softly went to her and turned her to him. Her eyes were filled with pain and confusion._

" _Listen to me and follow exactly what I say," he said firmly but kindly. She nodded and focused on him more than she had a moment before. "You need to imagine a box, the outside doesn't matter. The inside needs to big, like the TARDIS, so that all those memories can fit inside."_

 _He stopped talking as a look of concentration appeared across her face. Then slowly an old fashioned trunk began to materialize between them, much like the TARDIS does when it lands. When it was stable the Doctor continued._

" _Good," he praised. "Now you need to open it and imagine it's a vacuum and all the memories are specs of dirt. Let the chest suck them all in, once they are all inside, shut the lid but don't lock it."_

 _The lid to the chest popped open and there was a whipping wind that surrounded them but didn't touch them, then slowly the memories started to disappear into the chest. It took about ten minutes for the last of them to be sucked in and the lid snapped shut but didn't lock, just like he asked. He stepped around it and gently took Clara into his arms._

" _Amazing job Clara," he said before stepping back. "Now, I'm going to put you into a deep sleep. The TARDIS, while you are asleep, is going to go through your memories and sort them into the correct order and life. She is telepathic remember? And she grateful for you saving me. She wishes to return the favor. After you wake the memories won't be in your conscious mind. You will have to want to remember them for them to appear. Then you will be able to view them. It will take practice but I will help if you let me."_

" _Thank you Doctor," She said softly and hugged him again. He took her face in his hands, a mirror image of how their physical bodies were in the TARDIS and sent her mind into a deep, healing sleep._

 _The world faded around him and he found himself back on the bed in Clara's room. Her breathing had evened out and her features were no longer in pain. He stood gently and made his way back to consul room to take his friends home._

He came back to the present as she turned and hid her face in his chest, wrapping her own arms around him. She was shaking slightly, but she wasn't crying. He tightened his arms around her, as if to protect from a monster that wasn't there.

"How are you?" he asked gently. She was silent a moment before her voice came from somewhere near his chest.

"It doesn't hurt anymore, but I can still remember the pain," she leaned back slightly to look up at him. "I can't access the memories yet, I don't think I'm ready to, but I remember the pain. It's like after you have a headache and there is a phantom pain in your head after it's gone. Expect it's my whole body and mind."

"That's to be expected," he said softly and pulled her back against his chest. "You were torn apart by the time winds and forced back together again. You were in a thousand different times at once. If all you feel right now is a phantom pain, then you're well on your way to healing."

He heard her snort lightly.

"Thank you," she said softly.

"Always," he said as he gently lead her back to bed.

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 **Thought?**


End file.
